Hope and Faith

   Sorry about the lack of posts. We finally have Internet back at the guest house.  I guess I will update you guys on the most recent things that have been happening here. Two days ago was probably one of the most frustrating days I have experienced....ever.  The older girls were so disrespectful, rude, and all around disobedient.  The only explanation I can think of is due to the lack of discipline they have received.  We were constantly telling them to behave and finally told them we would not come back if they did not show us respect.  After a long day of frustration, the girls and I decided we would not be returning to the orphanage the following day.  The boys went to work on the water situation and explained to the children that we were not coming because we asked for respect and received the opposite.  The workers went to the boys and told them to bring us back the next day, and they would take care of the girls behavior problems.  After a day of prayer and spankings, we were headed on our long walk towards the orphanage not knowing what would be in store for us when we arrived.  We were greeted with smiling children, excited workers, a clean house, and unfamiliar faces.
   I watched as all the children came running out of the house with noodles all over their faces from the breakfast they had quickly devoured.  After Lodiana tackled me down with excitement, I saw two small, milk chocolate twin girls hiding behind Loveyou.  I quickly walked up to them expecting two eager little girls, but what I found was very different.  These reserved girls immediatley started to cry as we tried to play with them and find out their names.  When we asked the workers who they were, they shrugged their shoulders and told us their father just dropped them off and left.  No one knew their name or age.  After giving them candy to bribe them to come to me, they fell asleep in my arms.  I held those precious girls and tried to fathom the emotions they were dealing with as a strange white girl held them longer than they have probably ever been held before.  Without knowing their names or anything about them, I already loved them.
   Haley and I quickly pumped water into a white container and brought the girls into the bathroom.  As we poured the water on their dry skin, the girls stood completely emotionless.  After five minutes of singing "splish splash" while bathing the girls, Haley and I finally gave up on trying to make them feel more comfortable.  I went back to pump more water in the bucket, and I came back to see Haley laughing with one of the girls.  While one girl was peeing on herself, the other had fallen in the bathtub.  Everyone was laughing, and I was upset because I thought I missed so much.  We brought the girls outside and tried to get them to smile.  After many failed attempts of trying to figure out their names, Haley and I decided to name them Hope and Faith.  Faith is a smiling ball of joy that is already jealous if you show any attention to anyone other than her.  Hope is reserved, but smarter than any little girl I have ever met.  She knows what she wants, and she knows how to get it from you.  Both children stole my heart the first time I saw them crying and running from me.
   These girls gave me a new energy and purpose.  The pastor came to me at the end of the day, and he said, "since you love these girls, you can take them with you."  At first, I was completely disturbed.  He told me that their father left them at the orphanage to stay until they decided they could take care of themselves.  The sad truth is that most of these children have the same testimony.  Their parents drop them off with nothing but the clothes they have on and with no intentions of coming back.  As I cried with Hope in my arms, I made a decision then that I would allow myself to love these children as unconditionally as I possibly could. My prayer is that God gives me the peace, strenghth, and power to fufill what He has continually called me to do...love!

New people, New journey...really exciting!

  Wow. When I try to sum up my experience so far, that is the only word that comes to mind. This journey has been overall heart breaking and fulfilling.  God has been teaching my team and I how to truly rely on Him.  Looking back six months ago, I never thought this summer would come.  Now that we have been here for a week, I can honestly say that every trip has been different.  Even though I would love to say that I am spending my time with all the beautiful children that I have been working with the past year, I am having the awesome opportunity to minister to a completely different group of children.  The sad realization about working with seventy new kids is that the number of orphaned children in Haiti is continually growing.  Every day I think back to the last few words Bean told me before I left, "You cannot do it all."  In all honesty I just wanted to show him that I could.  God immediately showed me that the need was far too great, and the children did not need fixing.  They simply need to hear and see the truth of the gospel.

    The most exciting part of our journey is having Junior, my Haitian friend, stay with us at the guest house and help translate for us during our stay in Haiti.  Not only is Junior a tremendous blessing, but he also has been showing us the culture of Haiti that we have never heard or seen.  Last night our team was sitting on the balcony and talking about our relationship with our family members.  Not only was it strange to him that our family members were affected by our decision to spend our summer in Haiti, but he could not understand the strong relationships that we have with our siblings.  Junior began to explain that the people of Haiti do not have a concept of family.  For example, the mother's role to the children is to feed and discipline them.  Junior shared that many parents have never told their children that they love them, do not remember their birthdays, and have absolutely no idea what their children do outside of school.  Although this concept of families is foreign to many older Haitian people, educated young adults are slowly understanding the importance of building relationships with your family members. 

  This past week has been overwhelming with joy and exhaustion.  The children still have the same need for affection and attention.  I ended each day with a child asleep in my arms and two others wrapped around my legs.  I was reminded each day that our relationship with our Father should be the same way.  We should cling to Him at all times and come to Him for rest.  The team from Wade Baptist came this week, and our team was able to help the women at the orphanage prepare meals and wash the enormous mounds of clothes.  I sat down by an older women cooking dinner, and she handed me a large blade to peel carrots and cut leaves.  The entire time I was preparing the food I thought I was making a large dry salad.  At the end of the day, a small girl grabbed my hand and brought me to a big round pot which they used to make a delicious soup from the "salad" I had prepared.  At that moment, my entire perspective changed.  If we allow God to take control of every aspect of our lives, he can prepare us for something much greater that we could never do on our own.  In our bible studies, we have learned that in order to follow God fully, you must obey God blindly. God must be in control of our every thought, action, and desire.  Not because He deserves our obedience, but because He commands it.

  The adjustment has been a challenge, but every day we are reminded that our strength comes from the Lord.  Just to keep you guys laughing, I will share a few stories about our journey so far.  The second day at the orphanage I asked Junior to translate "freeze tag" for me.  After about the third time I ran up to some kids shouting out "freeze tag" in Creole, I asked Junior to translate "freeze tag" for me again.  He started laughing and told me he thought I said "free snacks".  Then I realized how crazy I looked running around tagging people and shouting "free snacks".  The fourth day at the orphanage the kids would continually ask Haley McMullan if she knew how to speak Creole.  All day she was curious why they would laugh after she told them that she spoke a little Creole.  When we were at the guest house, Junior informed her that she was saying "I fart".  Needless to say this week has been eye-opening and encouraging.  Stay in touch and keep up with our blogs.  I love you all!  

  

My Haiti journey...

I cannot believe that a year ago around this time I was getting ready to go on a trip to love on some children in a different country.  Well, that is what I thought I would be doing.  My journey with the people of Haiti did not start a year ago.  God had been preparing me for what I have experienced this year long before I even knew what being a believer was all about.  I remember the summer of my eighth grade year at church camp.  I watched this video about these orphaned children all around the world that were starving, helpless, and needy.  To say that those children touched my heart would be an understatement.  I knew God was calling ME to help them.  Little did I know that I had a long journey of preparation ahead of me.  When Bean told us my senior year that our church would be taking a trip to Haiti, I told him to sign me up.  I didn't even think twice.  I had no idea what I was getting myself into.  After loosing my passport on the plane and spending the night in Miami, I realized I was no longer in control.  My first trip to Haiti was an eye-opening experience, but I knew that my time was not over there.  God began to show me that although those children need my love and attention, they desperately need to know about Him.  Not only do they need to know what it means to be a believer of Jesus Christ, but they also need to be taught how to be a generation that shares the gospel in their country.  Before I get fired up, I will finish the rest of my journey. Ha! While I was in Haiti talking with my friends, I decided that I would figure out a way to come back...soon.  I called Bean and told him how amazing it was and all the things God was doing in my life.  He told me of the possibility that we would be going back to Haiti in November.  This past trip to Haiti was much different from the one before.  Although I was glad to be back, I held this resentment in my heart.  I couldn't stand coming into the lives of those small children and leaving after a few short days.  I could see the desperation in their eyes for us to stay with them.  I knew how lonely they would be without someone to hold them.  I grew angry and bitter at the fact that I was coming into their lives and taking it all away, but God showed me that we were doing much more than just showing them affection and attention.  God has called us to be disciple makers.  God has made us for the sole purpose of glorifying Him.  Even though I knew I was being a light, I knew in my heart that God was calling me to teach those 100+ children to reach the nations.  Once I realized that with His power, I could actually do what He was calling me to do, I asked Bean once again if there was any way we could come back for the summer.  Of course he said yes, and that is where the planning began.  The purpose of this summer is not to give those kids a lot of presents or play with them until they fall asleep in my arms.  The entire purpose is to teach those children how to have a radical faith in their God and teach them how to bring glory to His kingdom. So here we are, four days away from our journey, praying for God to prepare us for what lies ahead.  We simply ask you to do the same!